Friday, February 27, 2004

One good laugh.....

There are times when even Mike Barnicle makes inadvertent sense.
Oh don't get me wrong, you still have to penetrate Mike's thick high barbed wire mental barrier of slobbering sentiment, faux class consciousness, and cartoonish working class machismo to get anything.
But now and again he lets drop a memorable bon mot.
Today for example Mike called into the Imus program and waded right in with his usual hyperbolic hyperventilation...he was all happy-n-shit because Terrible Tim Russert has a turgid memoir coming out this spring called "Big Russ and Me".
Apparently this is a collection of humorous anecdotes revolving around Tim's father "Big Russ".
Since I haven't read it I can only imagine how inane, trite, and maudlin the book will be...in other words just the sort of trash Mike Barnicle can worship.
Amidst his praiseful rhapsodies for this book Mike let this howler rip:
"So much of life is biography" quotes the Grand Plagiarist and Chief Exaggerator, formerly of the Boston Globe's Metro section.
Good grief so much of the alleged biography Mike traded in back in old daze turned out to be sheer fiction and not even particularly interesting fiction at that.
I had to pull over in my car on the way to my phony-baloney job and laugh...
Mike never fails me, pompous yet unintentionally hilarious to the last...he is the very reason this blog exists.
Don't know what I'd do without him.

Thursday, February 26, 2004

The Passion of Alan...


Well, Alan Greenspan has gone and done it.
He went and called for reductions in social security benefits.
Specifically MY presumed social security benefits.
I'm not surprised, behind that cardboard sage facade, Alan remains a libertarian fanatic of the dreariest type.
It has only been a matter of time before Greenspan put the weight of his office as Fed Chairman and his ineffable prestige as a financial wizard behind such a reactionary proposal.
His timing though, is the main point of contention with the current occupant of the White House.
La Famiglia Arbusto would prefer to put social security cuts on the table after the 2004 election when they presumably plan to sit down with the rest of the conservative galaxy and send the welfare state off for the proverbial terminal dirt nap.
Their theory being they can hack the federal government to ribbons once Bush has a legit landslide under his belt.
Here is where the thinking gets ambiguous, clearly Rove etc are planning on a squeaker this November whilst hoping for a big mandate that they can interpret as a victory for GOP's revolutionary program.
They can't have both obviously so the size of Bush's margin governs how radical his proposals will be when the time comes.
Nevertheless, Alan has "jumped the gun" so to speak and put the issue on the front burner in campaign 2004.
His main thesis seems to be that the continued and uninterrupted flow of boons, perks, and benefits and tax cuts to the rich must now be financed out of MY few Federally guaranteed retirement monies.
Movement conservatism, that dying saurian seems to be "down to the raisins" to quote Abraham Lincoln.
We've countenanced shipping factories and jobs overseas, lost billions in large and small revenues, as a result the only way to keep the gravy train rolling for the overclass is to start robbing baby boomer retirees.
That is what it comes down to...and that fool President of ours can do naught but babble incoherently about his all but forgotten plan to partially privatize social security.
In all, a disheartening situation brought down on us solely by a bunch of hacks and ineptoids whose are in thrall to no one save their big money donors.
These people are bereft of ideas...all they seem to do is keep harping lower and lower taxes and an increasingly iniquitous revenue matrix.
Movement conservatism is so far gone down the rocky road to extinction that they are now forced to "dip into the principal" to keep those pay offs going to their paymasters.
What may come next though, is far more ominous, one must ask the question what will replace modern conservatism?
Nature abhors a vacuum, political nature most of all.
Something possibly more socially reactionary but explicitly socialist in terms of welfare and truculently xenophobic ...we see signs of this all the time nowadays.
Whether or not this fanciful movement replaces modern conservatism outright or simply co-opts the liberals on it's way to a fatal confrontation with the moribund right is another question entirely.
Meanwhile, Alan can't keep Bohemian Grove afloat without my money, and he'll have to fight me for that.

Wednesday, February 25, 2004

A suitable christian burial for Reform...

It may be, that down the line when there are better editorialists on the scene, that the downfall of the so called Romney "reform" agenda will be dated from 2-24-04.
That would be yesterday, when Willard Mitt Romney the Kolobian Viceroy of Massachusetts spoke up in favor of an amendment to the U.S. Constitution outlawing both gay marriage and civil unions.
Purists will recall Willard's stated opposition to just such an amendment during his glorious march to power in campaign 2002.
In the six months since the SJC decision legalizing gay marriage the Governor has taken a sad predictable course, from a reluctant acquiescence with the law, then a timorous peep in favor of civil unions, after that an amendment to the state constitution that defines marriage as an exclusively heterosexual affair thence to his current advocacy for a discrimination clause in the Federal constitution.
He isn't flip-flopping my friends, he is evolving...evolving into a rational GOP monster sufficiently spineless to rule a nation.
Romney spoke up in favor of Bush's crazy amendment for two very stark reasons:
1.) Current polling in Massachusetts indicates a bare majority (53%) are opposed to gay marriage. This was to be expected given a month or so of loud resistance from every wowser and pulpit demagogue in the Commonwealth.
These numbers gave Willard the necessary impetus to climb down sans further ado...such a backbone has our chilly reform minded Viceroy.
2.) To succeed as a national candidate for the GOP one must pick a horrific social issue beat on it like a gong.
Romney saw those out of state activists on the Common last week, as his future serfs and subjects...but they have to be thrown a big tasty bone if he wants to get anywhere come Super Tuesday 2008.
Therefore Romney is now opposed to gays and gay marriage simply because to espouse anything else would doom his hopes of being a Republican presidential candidate.
There will be no further sensible thinking on this matter from the Governor's office...it'll be nothing but "marriage is sacred" type blather 24-7.
The Chimes at Midnight has come to the sad conclusion that no "reform", be it economic, social, or political can be accomplished in the Bay State once the Governor starts aspiring to the Presidency. Dukakis fatally lost focus in the lead up to his run back in 1988 and the same now is happening to Romney.
This is of course assuming anyone (other than Scot Lehigh) really believes in Romney's reformist palaver.
More importantly what kind of a "reformer" proposes to restrict the lawful rights of a small and harmless minority?
Mitt has treated this issue with the same ruthless self interest that he displayed when shoving Jane "Jingle Money" Swift out of the corner office.
There is no doubt that over the short term this repellant opportunism will accrue to Romney's benefit, he may not get anyone elected to the legislature this fall but his stance will look very good to GOP primary voters far beyond the Berkshires.
The issue of gay marriage is probably a loser over the short term for liberal democrats and progressives...there is no doubt that Romney's current stance is correct in terms of expediency.
However the issue isn't going to vanish in a puff of smoke once demagogues like Bush and Schwarzenegger start yelling and making threats.
And anyway...what will all of Romney's beloved suburban independents make of his churlish war on homosexuality?
They may not see it his way when push comes to shove.
Moreover,Younger voters consistantly poll the strongest in favor of gay marriage, sooner or later they will inherit the polling booths and then we will see some shit!
Shout outs...

Boston Herald columnist Cosmo Macero seems to have thrown me some props on his blog.
Chimes at Midnight gets compared to Muhammad Ali and Marvin Hagler...which is nice-thanks guy.
Truth be told, we are still old timey Joe Frazier fans when the bell finally rings.
Ah Smokin' Joe...that knock down punch he threw Ali in Madison Square Garden seemingly took a freight train from Saint Louis-POW!
:)
BTW Chimes at Midnight must issue it's first correction, I misread the money allocated for "abstinence education" yester as a quarter of a trillion...it is in fact a quarter of a billion.
Whoops...

Tuesday, February 24, 2004

Nader and Naderism

Well as I predicted last week, Saint Ralph jumped into the presidential race as an independent.
The media will hype this heavily for the four weeks and murmur darkly about how this adversely affects the democrats.
Then they will move on....ho hum same old same old.
In truth there was little anyone could do about preventing Ralph from running again-sheer morbid ego propels him into the race.
For the last four years Nader has demonstrated time and again the willfulness of a sociopath when absolving himself of the 2000 debacle.
What I think the democrats have done right these last four years is delineating the diresome consequences of voting for a spoiler candidate like Ralph in a close election.
Sometimes this dialogue with the Greens and other Nader supporters has been quite harsh, that is to be regretted.
However the point has been made that in a national crisis, Nader-esque candidacies are a luxury American liberals cannot afford.
As a consequence of this, it is unlikely Nader will garner the same level of support this time around.
This is the best we can hope for quite frankly...2004 is supposed to be close election and Nader can still make a difference depending on his own whims and fancies...but at least this time we are prepared for any eventuality.
Other than that all we can do is engage in a positive fashion with the Nader supporters on the street and hope for the best.
If John Kerry was smart though, he'd use the Nader candidacy to cast himself as closer to the center than either George or Ralph.
He has already denounced the President's program as "revolutionary" in nature...now with Nader in the race he can highlight his own proposals as being inherently more sensible.
Well it is a thought anyway.
Terrorists and Schoolmarms.


So Secretary of Education Rod Paige thought it would be funny to call the N.E.A. a "terrorist organization" in front of the nation's governors yesterday.
Har dee har har Alice....
This is a good example of the sort of crude nonsense Bush Cabinet Officers imbibe every day...equal parts cruelty, ego and ignorance.
One pities the poor elementary school teacher who has to explain those remarks to her Social Studies pupils this morning.
That if the class doesn't turn teacher over to the Department of Homeland Security for questioning...lets not rule that out.
Of course this sort of abuse only goes one way in George Bush's frathouse U.S.A. (Upsilon, Sigma, Alpha don'cha know)...ghod forbid some teacher should call Rod Paige a vulgar lout in public, she or he would be dragged off in handcuffs accompanied by the outraged shriekings of Jeff Jacoby and Willaim Safire.
And if a student should dress up as Osama Bin Laden at Halloween, then it is time to call the Fear Patrol!
Good grief has a free people ever permitted such brutes and frauds to rule over them??
And not for nothing but Rod Paige is a corrupt bagman for greedy religious fanatics. His Department of Education has become little more than a source of bribes and payola for Baptist voodoo shamans all over the nation.
Salon.com reports that some 270 MILLION dollars, your tax money, has been allocated to promote a quaint christian religious dementia called "abstinence education". This is a doctrine of profound theological power that says if you tell kids not to have sex, they won't have sex....if you forbid guidance counselors to inform their charges about condoms, the AIDS infection rate will magically plummet.
Thanks to this state sanctioned superstitious shinola, Texas has one of the highest teen pregnancy rates in the nation.

This is in addition to Federal pay-offs to the usual anti-abortion racketeers who operate "clinics" that promote women's "health". These are, by and large, naught but publicly financed miniature churches that use a women's pregnancy crisis as an unparalleled recruitment opportunity.
My friends, christianity is in crisis, turn on any of the many many religious networks that infest your cable plan and all the preachers bleat the same thing...."times are troubled, turn to Jesus, send money".
The truth of the matter is, the churches are in profound crisis.
Their message has become so unpalatable that they need federal funding to mislead a few dopey schoolchildren and hapless unwed mothers.
Honestly if ghod had meant for Reverend Falwell to take over the public school system of the nation, wouldn't he have given the malevolent minister the money?
What does that tell you as to ghod's real plan for America?

So when Rod Paige is chuckling and calling teacher's terrorists, he is in fact, playing up to the organized ignorance activists he himself is bankrolling to the tune of a quarter of a trillion dollars a year.
Sick
Demented
Typical...

Monday, February 23, 2004

Notorious Fag Icon denounces gay marriage, demands U.S. Presidency...


Boy oh boy how many young gay men tossed off to muscle pics of Arnold Schwarzenegger back in the day?
Those oily gleaming muscles, that pout, those sneering sloe eyes...all very appealing to a boy with decisively homosexual proclivities I'd say.
So it is pretty ironic to think Governor Schwarzenegger is howling with rage at that ever-lengthening line of queers in San Francisco that is applying for marriage licenses.
The Guv rumbles darkly about "unrest" and no doubt fantasizes about leading a tank platoon down Castro Street.
I'm sure some of those men in line out in San Fran are feeling well...betrayed.
Arnie is pretty strategically homophobic for a guy who started out in pro bodybuilding, the gay-est "sport"
on record next to Olympic figure skating.
:)
Oh well it's hopeless to accuse GOPeople like Schwarzenegger of mere hypocrisy...a ruthless self interest and a callow disregard of how they appear to others is the very air these bastards breath.
****
But wait there is more, having seized the governorship of California in a nicey-nice coup, Arnold is now denouncing article two section five of the U.S. Constitution...you know that pesky little detail that prevents foreign born citizens from becoming President.
Frankly it's this beleaguered little clause that prevents Rupert Murdoch from marching into the White House and acclaiming himself Ming the First, Emperor of the Universe.
This country has been mighty good to a social climbing, money grubbing steroid addled freak like Arnold S.
Mighty good.
We are under no obligation to change our laws to suit his need to rule over the nation, whip in hand, like a plantation overseer.
And if we chose not to extend Presidential qualifications to him, then so be it.
Why should HE have constitution rewritten for his own benefit? No one extended the same courtesy to my saintly old grandfather back when he was fresh off the boat from Ireland.
Alas the incumbent President's favorite senatorial lap-dog is already button-holing congress to pass a constitutional amendment allowing those with twenty year's citizenship to run for President.
Given the fact that only a week ago, John Ashcroft was asking for new restrictions on immigration and suggesting that second generation immigrants should not be automatically enfranchised then we can only hope Senator Hatch's appalling proposal will founder on the rocks of GOP atavism.
Sure and THAT has become the last hope of our once sacred rights and freedoms.

Sick
Demented
Typical...

Friday, February 20, 2004

I was just thinking...

VH1 should be retitled the self congratulation channel.

Just who the hell is Moe Rocca anyway?

And Donal Logue?
A decade from now are we all supposed to sigh and say "we knew him when he was a mere talking head on VH1"?

Why didn't George Bush Jr. dress up like Speed Racer for the Daytona 500 last weekend?
His exquisite sense of costumery has gone south since the body bag total went over five hundred...

Goldberg's contract is up next month. It sounds like he won't be renewing.
Oh well...it was fun while it lasted...

Dean is out of the race for President...and I still think there is bad faith somewhere in his campaign apparatus the way that forty one million disappeared so completely.
I don't think Dean is at fault, but I do suspect someone had sticky fingers.

Regrettably, Nader will run again this year.
I doubt he'll get the same numbers or attention this time, as his schtick gets tiresome after a while.

Want to have some fun?
Tune in to your local Fox Affiliate, for the ten o'clock news and turn off the sound completely.
When you see the "news" anchors rolling their eyes and smirking comically turn the sound back on, inevitably they are talking about a democrat.

Dan Kennedy is priceless...he really makes McGrory, McNamara, Vennocchi and Lehigh look like a bunch of phonies.
For his own sake I hope the Globe never hires him.

I think Deirdre Imus is some kind of gold-digging voodoo shamaness...how else to explain Don Imus persistence on the airwaves long past the hope of putrefaction?

If Kerry wins this fall and if the Great and General Court does manage to strip Romney of his power of senatorial appointment, we democrats will have an embarrassment of riches by way of potential candidates.
Minimally you could see a spectacular three way race between Marty Meehan, Barney Frank, and Bob Reich.
With Ed Markey prowling around outside muttering to himself and who knows perhaps the unquiet shade of Steve Grossman waiting in the wings.

Damned if I know who I would vote for under these happy circumstances...

Thursday, February 19, 2004

Plots are afoot...
in the State Legislature to alter the means by which vacancies in the U.S. Senate are filled.
In the good olde days, if there was a vacancy in one our U.S. Senate seats, the governor appointed an interim senator to a two year term until an election could be held.
That is an appointment sans recourse to the advice and consent of any one, under the present rules, should John Kerry carry the day this fall nothing prevents Mitt Romney from appointing Andy Dick to the position.
Well, that is assuming Andy can qualify as a resident of Massachusetts, but fear not, The Kolobian Viceroy has experience in these matters.
Frankly it is a very autocratic arrangement and it is far past due to be changed.
An immediate election to fill out the unexpired term is far more democratic in nature.
Oh Mitt will hiss and cry about this don't you worry, but someone has to play hardball with him sometime and it might as well be about this issue.
I have no problem with the Man from Kolob being cast as a defender of royal prerogative....which is all the senatorial appointment amounts to.
And no fer nothin' but, just what sort of hopelessly embarrassing hack will Mitt dredge up to fill the position anyway?
Jane "Jingle Money" Swift?
That has to be an intriguing proposition...it would get her out of the state and leave Mitt with the option of blitzkrieging her again come the GOP senatorial primary in 2006. Anyway once you get into the habit of humiliating a woman in public, it is hard to stop-at least when you are Willard Mitt Romney.
How about Steve Pierce?
Is Steve Pierce still alive? If not he wouldn't be the first corpse to achieve a position of high public trust thanks to the GOP.
How about Ralph Martin?
Ralphie boy is probably the only class candidate on Romney's list....but one doubt's he'd accept the appointment...he has said no to many many other temptations over the years.
Kerry Healey?
An interesting possibility Kerry is Mitt's biggest liability right now...little more than a mail clerk elevated to the Lieutenant Governorship. She could hold the slot for Romney until the Governor could put together the usual bullshit grass-roots surge for his own senate candidacy in 2006.
The problem here is, that leaves Secretary of State Billy "The Prince of Darkness" Galvin as Mitt's lawful successor for two whole years....
After this collection of beggars and losers, the pickin's get mighty slim...we are down to the GOP's precious few in the Great and General Court...headed by hapless brown-nosers like Brian Lees.
Nope I have a feeling that switching over to a off-year election system would be doing Mitt a favor.

Wednesday, February 18, 2004

Wednesday Notes:

So far it has been a year of tumbles and bruises for the big time national news media.
Never let it be said these guys weren't ready to mount up and charge after some other misty chimera.
Battered and humiliated they never admit they are wrong and are never at a loss for an opinion no matter how predictable.
It'd almost be glorious if it wasn't so farcical.
Thus we had mainstream windbag Jeff Greenfield on Imus today, desperately trying to spin the results in Wisconsin into an exciting two man race between Edwards and Kerry.
Purists will recall John Edwards lost last night preserving his 15 and 1 record in the democratic primaries.
Nonetheless that pompous old fraud Jeff Greenfield needs a story to tell, and John Edwards is all that he has left now that it looks like Dean is dropping out.
All of Jeff's other predictions have blown sky-high to date, so if I was Senator Edwards I'd beware all this "two man race" guff.
Still the Senator from North Carolina is a successful barrister, I'm sure he can tell the difference between shit and shinola.
Meanwhile John Kerry soldiers on despite rumors that the Deaniacs are about to defect en-masse to Edwards....which would be hilarious if it happened.
I mean, didn't Edwards happily vote for the IWR, the very thing that makes JK anathema to the Dean hard core?
We like to think elections are about issues great and small, and they try to be, they really do.
More often or not though, elections turn into vast national referenda on personalities....but mostly on the collective personalities of the voting public and not the candidates.
So we'll see, I had to come to my senses in 1992, I thought Bill Clinton was a gone goose.
It was hard to put the work I had done on behalf of Paul Tsongas behind me.
So I think I know what everyone is going through right now, I must've moped until June.
For what it is worth, if there are any hard core Dean or Edwards or Clark supporters out there reading this, console yourself with the image of George Bush Jr. facing the microphones at 2am on election night, tears streaming down his monkey face as he stammers "I've just got off the phone with President Elect-Kerry..."
The rest is drowned out by an animal roar of hate and rage from GWB's beaten and humiliated toadies and contributors.
Think about that...
:)

Tuesday, February 17, 2004

Howard Fineman's End....

Howie rang up Imus today and fairly gushed forth a cataract of boilerplate buncombe. Quite frankly in his ponderous Great Man of the News mode, Fineman is every bit as boring as Laura Ingraham with a soporific mellifluous voice to boot.
He did get off one very telling howler though, back a few years ago Fineman was on a low-rated cable yakker called "Capital Gang Sunday Night" on CNN.
It was eventually cancelled due to low ratings an embarrassment that the Newsweek Solon explained as "It was the only gig I had..."
No, to be precise, it was the only TELEVISION gig he had at the time...see the difference?
It never occurs to this blatant hustling media whore that hiring out one's opinions to the highest bidder are a BAD thing for so called journalists to do.
That it creates an endless series of potentially interlocking conflicts of interest that are best resolved in the favor of the highest bidder more often or not.
What is it about the apex DC damage monkey pundits that they HAVE to get a steady TV gig by fair means or foul?
I mean who told them that fame-money-and-big time journalism all marched in lock step??
Sick
Demented
Typical...

Friday, February 13, 2004

Back to their old tricks...


Joanie the phony Vennochi and Jeff Jacoby that laughing young senescence double teamed Kerry on the Op Ed page of the Globe yesterday.
So clearly Morrissey Boulevard is up to it's old tricks again.
I have to give them credit, they have recovered nicely from the Great Humiliation dealt them by John Forbes Kerry in New Hampshire.
I figured they'd be waddling around stunned and incoherent for a good two or three months...but no it's a bare three weeks later and the local punditariat is up and at Kerry again.
Captain Ahab couldn't be more mono-obsessive...it is inspiring really.
Joanie was hyping all those "troubling" questions about Kerry's "waffling"...insisting that the Senator had some splainin' to do.
Jacoby said almost the same thing with the usual proviso that Kerry wasn't evil per se merely a threat to us and all our progeny.
In sum, nothing new.
Of course the President's record of waffling and cupidity is always passed over in silence...at various times the Admin has suggested that Saddam could remain as President of Iraq under a tight proliferation regime, that Al Queda was hooked up with Baghdad, that "we knew" where the WMD's are, that it about "heeding" the screams of the tortured...pretty much whatever would get the necessary headline was the order of the day in the lead up to this war.
The mark of a neocon wannabe at the Globe is their firm belief that John Kerry that MUST be held to a very high standard indeed...a standard these jack-offs wouldn't DARE apply to George Bush Jr.
All around us we see the rubble of a republic fast falling to ruins.
Consensus is lost on preserving social security, expanding affordable health care, our troops are jeered and bombed all over Iraq...billions are wasted on inane budgetary priorities and jobs are shipped out wholesale to foreign countries.
The electorate is divided into bitter hostile camps and power and privilege are openly reckoned in the White House on the basis of the citizenry remaining fragmented and truculent.
This is the legacy of the President's stern simple-minded theology-tinged "leadership"....
Whatever John Kerry has "waffled on" or mulled over or whatever it pales into insignificance next to the series of disasters Bush has stumbled into again and again nigh these four years gone.
And for the record Kerry didn't think twice in 1968 when he joined the navy...no waffling there when something important was on the line.
But then neither did Bush, he made that one fateful phone call to Dad, slipped to the head of the line in the National Guard and went on a four year bender.
And all Joanie and Jeffy can do is prattle on about Bush's leadership style and "authenticity" that trumps all accusations of lying.
Honestly what pap.
Jeff's loathing for Kerry is entirely understandable, he is a conservative, Kerry is a liberal....what more needs be said?
Alas Joanie is part of that post-Howie Carr class of local columnist that insist success in the op-ed racket is a function of destroying some successful politician.
In horrible Howie's case it was Mike Dukakis, and the Herald's little hatchetman has dined out ever since on Mike's fall in 1988-1990.
Joanie and her colleagues hope to achieve the same power and status over the corpus liberalis of John Kerry.
A Kerry victory is therefore devoutly to be wished if for no other reason than the aggravation it'll cause the whole of the Globe's pundit line up.

Thursday, February 12, 2004

Maybe I'm all stupid-like....


Young NG Lieutenant George Bush Jr. has dental work done on at an Alabama air base on January sixth 1973....yet somehow managed to overlook reporting for his mandatory flight physical the previous August?
And no one called him out on this?
Up until now Bush's NG "service" record struck me as naught but an example of the President's sloth and reliance on privilege to evade irksome situations.
A poor reflection on his character but nothing new.
Now however thanks to the latest White House document dump, I'm beginning to think the Admin is trying to cover something up.
Something he was doing in 1972-73 that they don't want uncovered....what that is I do not know.

Sick
Demented
Typical...

Laura Ingraham on Imus yesterday...


What do the delirium tremens sound like at 7:45am on a Wednesday morning?
A lot like Laura Ingraham I think.
Oh poor Laura was fairly frantic yesterday on Imus, usually she gets a free pass from the I-Zombie....not this time though he started calling the President a "liar" which made Ingraham go laughably ballistic.
She started screeching incoherently about Kerry voting against the "Tomahawk missile" and then tried to launch into a litany of his other sins before Imus snorted and cut her off.
Apparently even He finds Laura boring these days.
The funny thing about Laura Ingraham is how tenuous her sarcastic-hipster demeanor is when it encounters the slightest challenge.
She is a true believer in the Eric Hoffer sense of the term....the slightest contradiction and the bonhomie is replaced by homicidal dementia.
Frankly after listening to this performance I'm beginning to think Laura is bipolar. Maybe she drinks in order to obscure that....who knows?
Whatever it is, it makes for thrilling if unintentionally hilarious radio.
Laura really still believes that any day now the 82nd Airborne Division is going to dig up a real bona fide doomsday machine in Tikrit with the words "Property of Saddam Hussein" stenciled on the side in bright red paint.
Case in point, Imus accuses the admin of hyping the WMD evidence which induced Laura to howl with Lear-like agony "George Bush DIDN'T ignore the screams of Iraqi women and children in the torture chambers!!!!"
I burst out laughing right in the middle of traffic...pity Saddam's former victims that they have so crude and melodramatic an advocate fighting the lonely fight on AM radio.
On the subject of truck bombs and the like, Miss Ingraham maintains a decorous silence.
Still, I have to give her credit. The release of the President's incomplete and contradictory National Guard records caused her to shout "vindication" like a well trained parrot.
I however played a little private joke on Ingraham. When Imus announced her as the next guest, I wrote down in my notes "The release of GWB's NG records=vindication"...Laura came on and with ten minutes I was able to simple put a check mark next to the above sentence.
She is that predictable and reliable, Karl Rove must be in love with her...assuming he has anything left after worshipping Bush Junior for so long.
I dunno, I think all that Jack Daniels has started to back up on Laura, she might not be a good long term prospect in the Brave New America.
Still she is fighting the good fight on behalf of phantom doomsday machines, the future victims of Baathist car bombs, and poor helpless tomahawk missiles everywhere.
It is inspiring.

Such is the Kingdom of Heaven
On the Congressionally licensed airwaves
and Elsewhere.
2-11-02
7:50am EST
God Save the Republic.

Wednesday, February 11, 2004

Meanwhile....

Six months ago, when the SJC's gay marriage decision first came down, Governor Romney gritted his pearly whites and said that the law must be upheld even if we disagree with it.
Three months ago he said he'd be open to a Vermont style civil union law despite the fact that the SJC's finding was in favor of full marriage rights.
Now today, Romney is shilling a superfluous amendment to the state constitution enshrining marriage as the union of "one man and one woman".
For Romney this slow timorous climb-down still represents progress given the fact that he himself is the descendent of noted polygamists.
And in just three more months at the rate he is going Romney is be no doubt advocating "humane deportation"
of all queers...or maybe just the ones who request marriage licenses.
Who knows, only Mitt's pollster knows for sure what his policy will be.
For such is the power of a few hampers full of irate letters from out of state snake handlers and born again voodoo wowsers.
***
But then, Mitt is getting help from the ever solicitous democratic leadership of the House and Senate. Finneran and Travaglini are on the verge of permitting a divisive wedge issue on the 2006 ballot (when incidentally the Kolobian Viceroy is up for re-election) so they can escape being called "homo-lovers" by Mitt's oh so scary collection of state legislature candidates come the fall.
No doubt the current sorry situation will play big in the N.H. primary four years hence when it comes time for the Man from Kolob to seek out new subjects.
Assuming the amendment passes and it goes on the ballot, we can look forward to obscene ana irrational campaign adverts denouncing gay marriage in the crudest most demagogic terms possible-all paid for with reams of out of state monies.
Given the sorry and soul-degrading spectacle to come, are we all sure that given Seth and Perry a marriage license is such an intolerable provocation??

Tuesday, February 10, 2004

The Dean for Veep thing...

Who the hells start floating Veep trial balloons in February fah crissakes?
Howard Dean does for all the good it will do him.
This is the time of year when any sane presidential candidate no matter how far behind he trails, does nothing but prophesy total victory.
Even the least and most diminished candidate loudly proclaims his disinterest in the vice presidency at this stage of the game. If they play their cards right come convention time, then no one will take their fusty denials seriously....not with party unity and the chimera of victory on the line.
Hell not even Hubert Humphrey in the full flood of his ravenous ambition for office would've started spouting about the vice presidency no matter how far down in the polls he was....
It calls into question Dean's patience and professionalism, hell even a newbie like General Clark understands the need for a pose of reticence!
Ah but it's got to be a painful comedown for Doctor Dean...this is a precipitous fall that is seldom seen in U.S. Politics.
A month ago Dean was campaigning all over the map like Yosemite Sam...now look at him.
Babbling about the Vice Presidency...which is naught but the desperate hope that Edwards or Clark can stop Kerry in time for Dean to win a primary or two and get himself into dealmaking position.
The man is still fundraising frantically....for what the second spot???
His supporters had better take a second look at all this...

Monday, February 09, 2004

Russert at High Noon


Fat Tim Russert took his victory lap on the Imus in the Morning show today.
Ghod I am so sick of this bloated shyster quoting his semi-mythical father "Big Russ" whenever the Meet the Press host wants to wallow in self congratulation...it is all beginning to sound very weird and unsettling.
Nonetheless given the size and morbidity of his ego, Tim Russert is the perfect interlocutor for our vain increasingly delusional President.
Very pleased with himself Tim was...all for asking the President a bunch of questions that GWB should've answered like a man a long ago.
It was akin to a make-up class compleat with the President sitting there glassy eyed looking obviously bored with his own lies and evasions.
Bush is still shilling for an phantom Iraqi nuclear weapons program....but more and more the President's rhetoric is composed of serenely assured statements followed by timorous corrections and wholesale revisions scattered throughout the remnants of the "thinking press".
GWB even promised to release all his pay stubs and personal data to counter rumors that he was AWOL from the Air National Guard for most of 1972.
The President then added with near psychotic aplomb "that information was already released in 2000" (hint, it wasn't and still has not been).
The draft evasion issue is said to be at best window-dressing...after all Dan Quayle and Bill Clinton both evaded the draft to the best of their abilities.
That is true....we've heard this story before and since others got a pass, Bush will get one or so coos the conventional wisdom.
Then again Quayle and Clinton were not war time Presidents.
Still that argument is a fine one and apt to get overlooked come next fall.
Nevertheless, the AWOL thing goes to the heart of who Bush really is as a leader-at least that is how I see it.
It is ultimately, a question of privilege....not of pay stubs and the like.
We can't change the fact that he was honorably discharged.
Still, it is clear Bush got in on privilege, got out on privilege and never gave any of it single thought even though someone had to go to Viet Nam in his place...someone more than likely poor and ill-connected to the world of power.
Just how much privilege is George Bush entitled to anyway?
How much more does he expect?

That might've made a good question from the curiously deferential Mr. Tim Russert.

Entitlement is something John Kerry understands as well, he grew up in fairly patrician circumstances.
He also understood at a young age that unrestricted privilege is a kind of galloping medievalism in the making.
Hence Kerry volunteered for the navy and then volunteered for hazardous duty in Viet Nam....winning a chestful of medals in the process.
The Senator's view of privilege is therefore markedly different that the President...much was given John Kerry therefore much was expected of him.
It is noblesse oblige....but we've had precious little of that these last few years with all our wild talk of revolution and empire.
And frankly given a choice between empire or revolution I'll take John Kerry's concept of service every time.
It is at least something that takes circumstances and limitations into account.

Friday, February 06, 2004

Dressed to Shill

Michael Powell....the poor dear.
Oh the F.C.C. Chairman must be simply livid, fairly writhing from the exquisite irony.
He spends three years cheerleading and approval an endless tidal wave of telecom mergers only to watch helpless as Viacom, owners of NBC and MTV blows the whole shithouse sky high with a tasteless half time show at the Superbowl.
That has to hurt, Powell has made trillions for these bastards and how do they reward him?
By rousing the wowsers and values charlatans in the red states to an apocalyptic fury.
Not fer nuthin' though but it is in the end but one small withered wooden teat....paltry stuff in a world of dirty bombs and fatwahs.
Yeah yeah I know...kids were watching it took us all by surprise...all those Department of Homeland Security precautions
yet a naked guy runs amok and Janet Jackson's wholly manufactured tittie flaps ungraciously in the Texas breeze.
But fear not, here comes F.C.C. Chair "Toy" Michael Powell the steadfast tin soldier of the Bush Revolution, putting on his big scary monster voice promising fines and frowns for all the miscreants concerned.
Viacom must be laughing that the impotent self righteous spectacle Powell is making of himself.
This has to be killing Michael though, a rolodex gone fat with lucrative post government service contacts, an easy future as a telecom lobbyist on the horizon, and that no-talent Timberlake has to blow it all sky high with one flick of his dainty wrist.
No wonder Powell is apoplectic...Viacom is one sixth of his future clientele...hell within two years it'll one fourth of his net income by commission.
You think he wants to levy these fines and make all these protesting squawks?
Hell No!
Alas Toy Michael is caught between the professional outrage mountebanks and his future masters in the private sector...a delicious lose-lose situation.
Couldn't happen to a nicer guy quite frankly.
If this keeps up our poor preposterous fraud might have to extend his sojourn in public service...
Something that could be precious and lovely to see even if the public interest is trampled underfoot every day with Powell at the F.C.C.
Sick
Demented
Typical...

Thursday, February 05, 2004

Newsfreak....

Faced with a dearth of conservative opinion at virtually all levels of journalism, Newsweek magazine has bucked the conventional wisdom by hiring a real live rightical chic Dartmouth Review member to covered the 2004 campaign.
Ryan Gorsche, a pompous affected Dartmouth undergrad, has secured a priceless sinecure composing a column entitled "Minority Opinion".
Gotta give the kid credit, he has the gubernatorial sense of irony down pat.
Oh don't worry now, despite his Ivy League pedigree Ryan has all the simple-minded buzzwords down pat. He plaintively asks rhetorically three times in one column why "liberals don't speak out against terror?"
I of course am left wondering, why more campus republicans don't do something about terror-like maybe join the Marine Corps.
And anyway, just what does a 20+ year old boy have to contribute to the marketplace of ideas in an election year whether he is left or right?
Most of the DC punditariat comport themselves like snobby schoolyard cliques under the best of circumstances...one doubts Ryan can do anything to elevate the discourse despite his nominal maturity advantage.
Frankly, the exposure to Newsweek's so called "journalistic values" will only do the Ryan damage in the weary wicked end.
He is already crippled with a kampus konservative's unidimensional view of the world...how will Ryan's tender boyish sensibilities survive watching a vain power worshipping media whore like Howard Fineman in action?
I pity the hapless lad, I really do.
Soon enough the campaign will end and Ryan will end up pounding the pavement in Georgetown...begging for financial scraps from Richard Mellon Scaife and crying poor mouth at every well groomed door step.
He will talk dolorously of the awful oppression suffered by conservatives in Hanover N.H. capping his sad tail of woe with the Stalinist excesses at Newsweek magazine.
AND LO...the checks and loose change will roll in like a high lunar tide!
Another poor helpless campus conservative rescued at the last moment from the vast churning liberal tide...oh it will make a great book for Regnery with a introduction by Laura Ingraham and a blurb from Ann Coulter...
It is money in the bank kiddo...money in the bank.
Ryan Gorsche will be dining out on this experience for the rest of his life no matter how horrid he makes it all sound.
Believe that,
Player...

Wednesday, February 04, 2004

Right metaphor, wrong candidate....

The Chimes at Midnight is sometimes wrong...or to put it charitably, half-right.
Back before New Years I idly suggested that a "Bobby Kennedy Moment" spotlight at center stage and all was being relentlessly prepared for General Wesley Clark.
At the time the former NATO Commander seemed to have that ineffable RFK-like mixture of resume and known leadership qualities.
At the time, it was wise, even for the most committed Kerry supporter to perhaps look around for a decent and honorable alternate.
I freely admit this, any other Kerry die hard would say the same, IF you got them drunk enough.
Look what a difference a mere sixty days makes!
Clark tied for first place in Oklahoma with Edwards which has been his best performance to date!
I'm a little shocked at how lackluster the Clark effort has been...but there is in the end something to be said for a long experience of elected public life...an area in which Kerry, Edwards, and Dean all have an advantage.
Nope it is looking more and more like Clark got in because he sensed Kerry was about to tank in N.H. and he, the General could prosper by seeming forfeiture.
This was not necessarily a poor analysis back before Christmas, hell Wellington looked like toast for most of the day at Waterloo....and we all know how that turned out.
The candidate who has seized the RFK moment has turned out to be John Edwards...relentlessly on message, famously upbeat...an ubiquitous campaigner who promises jobs-n-victory 24-7.
I gotta give the guy credit, like Kerry he came up in the polls the hard way if he is in the race to the finish he has earned the run.
General Clark however, seems to be tanking...he may yet recover the initiative but like Edwards and even Kerry to a certain extent, the General is running as a centrist-and that part of the feed is already crowded with claimants.
There was a time when the formula was simply Kerry+Clark or Clark+Kerry in order to co-opt the moderates and present a game face to the general election.
Now however with Edwards on a roll the equation changes to Kerry+Edwards...Dean is fading fast and the big question there is how to induce his followers to support the ticket?
As for General Clark?
Well, it is not such a bad thing for a Secretary of Defense to have run hard and clean in the democratic presidential primaries. Laying claim to a constituency as a cabinet member has certain intangible advantages.
This is all woolgathering on my part...much is dependent on Kerry's continuing prosperity and that can change in an instant.
Health to all our candidates...

Tuesday, February 03, 2004

Ugly news day....

A post Superbowl pall has settled over the Boston Globe, college students rioted in the aftermath of the Pats victory and John Kerry despite all continues his improbable march to glory.
The streets of Boston all the way from Northeastern to Morrissey Boulevard are crowded with wreckage and punctured egos.
This malaise has even penetrated the op-ed page wherein today Joan Vennocchi sighed, swore, and halfhearted tried to pump up a "Romney for Veep" bid.
Poor poor Joan...this must be tough, never a particularly diligent reporter she faithfully babbled all the Right Things about John Kerry and look how she ended up...?
Inane and isolated.

The more I read of the Globe's op-ed page the more I realize this is the most ignorant self satisfied bunch of phonies that has been fielded by an aspiring national newspaper in fifty years.
And more than a few of them seem to be "non practicing attorneys"....and we all know how much lawyers just love the plain unvarnished truth don't we?
Nonetheless, there is a dispirited "another country heard from" quality to Joan's Romney for Veep jihad....because clearly the Commonwealth just deserves an Acting Governor as trite and ill-prepared as Kerry Healey.
If Joan can't destroy John Kerry then she'll figuratively destroy the state with Governor Kerry Healey-a personage clearly unqualified to act as a school crossing guard in Beverly.
Kerry is surging in the polls (as of today), meanwhile Romney (the hero of the Globe's punditariat) languishes with low public approval ratings.
Having been proven wrong about damn near everything, what is a sensible columnist to do?
Why elevate a batty lightweight Lt. Governor to the corner office-that'll generate some headlines.
Sick
Demented
Typical...

Monday, February 02, 2004

Naked Houston...

There is no better metaphor for the lamentable state of "Homeland Security" than the streaker who briefly disrupted the Super Bowl yesterday.
Pursued ineffectually by a hapless team of police, our naked indictment of the system ran pink and amok before straying too close to Patriots' linebacker Matt Chatham and getting power-slammed to the Houston turf.
"Gloom and doomers" will recall that Tom Ridge and the "H-Men" from the Department of Homeland Security declared the Astrodome a "special security site" before and during the game.
This meant it was a no fly zone and all guarded bythe likes of the Delta Force, the Death's Head Hussars, the Imperial Guard, Caesar's Tenth Legion, th' Black Watch, The Wild Geese, the Sikhs and the Ten Tigers of Kwantung.
All made a mockery of in due course the moment one naked attention-seeker stepped onto the field.
I'm beginning to think that Tom Ridge really can't do anything right on a very basic "Don't-have-Gilligan-do-it" kind of level.
All kidding aside what if that guy had dynamite strapped to his body?
What if he had several like minded accomplices in the stands?
Sure it would've been tough to smuggle dynamite into the stadium....but the proximity to the field and a nationwide audience has a irresistible attraction for the shameless and the homicidal.
Think about that.
But thank Ghod almighty in heaven above no doubt the H-Men down in DC are pulling double shifts right now in order to figure out a high tech test for "potential nakedness."