Sorry Ma'am, why don't you try for that other lifeboat just over the horizon?

In her current Boston Globe column Joanie Vennochi said among other things, the following:

"Liberals raised as Catholics refuse to accept this reality. We think we can be prochoice, pro-gay marriage , pro-gay adoption, and in favor of married and female priests and still call ourselves Catholic. The people who make the rules say we don't meet the criteria."

Ehhhh what is this "we" shit white woman??

Joanie, you can't be enrolling yourself in the Liberal Legion after the election cycle you've just had.

Nope sorry.

Others may be taken by your sudden burst of high minded anti-clericalism, but Humble Elias cryeth foul!
Where were you when John Kerry was being all but run out of the congregation by the Bishops in 2004?
C'mon Joanie pull those columns, you might've hissed and recoiled a bit over it, but mostly you just cut JK dead.
Now suddenly the bishops have you and yours in the cross-hairs and so thus Joanie demands action??

You just don't get to call our players cowards traitors and bullies like a demented cheerleader and then think someone is gonna make room for you in the last life boat as the SS Vatican plunges into the Stygian depths.
No...sorry dat ain't happening.
I'm sure you are just dyin' with worry for liberal catholics after having done your queenly best to run over with a steamroller the candidate of all liberal catholics in the 2004 election.
Joanie please for your own sake, flip over to the GOP I'm told the process is painless, then you can scream like a stuck pig all you like.
Save for strange columns like this, you walk talk and think like a freeper and it is long past due that someone said as much simply & plainly.

Cause' frankly, I don't wanna be on the same side as you.
I'm willing to put up with everyone from Billy Galvin out to Gore Vidal...but you Joanie you got (in the words of the late Lenny Bruce) "A talent for making people vicious".
I'm real sorry that ther RCC has abandoned you, they've been abandoning a lot of people for a long time and and they will continue to do so until Benny da Pope gets his tight airless pseudo-protestant congregation goin'.
It is cold out there dog-paddling in the middle of the ocean, I should know that is where you left me circa November 2004.
you wanna get picked up? just swallow your pride and give Ray Flynn and William Donohue a shout.
You belong with them, you've got the "I hate John Kerry" bona fides, they'll take you in.
Maybe.