Planks for 06'

You can’t beat somebody with nobody so the old saying goes. Similarly, you can’t beat something with nothing. By that, Humble Elias means a program is necessary to beat Mitt Romney next year. All well and good to compare Deval Patrick, Joe Kennedy, Tom Reilly, or Billy “The Prince of Darkness” Galvin on the charismatron. Nonetheless, whoever is nominated is gonna need a platform, preferably elegant, terse, and most of all easy to remember.
Therefore the Chimes at Midnight offers up a few notable planks for the delectation of candidates, conventions, primary and general election voters:

1.) Jobs: Since the start of the last recession, Massachusetts has lost two hundred thousand jobs to the vagaries of an uncertain market. Moreover, Fleet Bank, Gillette, indeed anything worthwhile and local has been bought out, downsized, and shipped out to the wild blue yonder. “bought out and shipped out: welcome to Mitt Romney’s Massachusetts” so the bumper sticker should read. Any democrat with brain one has to talk about jobs and Decaf’s butterfingered inability to hold onto any of them. Lets not forget Mitt’s answer to all this is to cut unemployment benefits thus driving down the purchasing power of underclass even further. The Commonwealth cannot compete with Thailand and Mexico, to do so is itself deflationary suicide. No, the answer for better or worse is growth, so the dems must seize hold of this simple concept.

2.) Pot holes: Humble Elias is not kidding around, the roads in Massachusetts are utterly deplorable. The only thing we seem to be producing at a rapid clip are deep axle busting furrows in the streets. At our current rate we will all be driving to the polling places in 2006 on blown shock absorbers and then hobbling into the voting booths with our broken ankles. This may seem like a provincial and even silly issue, but Mitt’s suburban independents love commuting to work by car, and its a very bumpy ride they are taking of late. Potholes, artfully underscore the lavish undeliverable promises Romney has made in so many other areas anyone remember his vow to reform auto insurance, child health care, or his missionary scheme to rehabilitate ignorant parents? A pattern of unfulfilled promises has begun to emerge with Romney, those pot holes though, give the lie to his entirely fraudulent “reform agenda”.

3.) Continuity of Governance: Romney’s weak point is his vanity and crude ambition, he wants very badly to be President and will happily sell out the Commonwealth in the attempt. A wise democrat will vow loudly and early on to seek no “higher” office whilst serving as Governor and to refuse all entreaties to do likewise and the same. Always and everywhere the notion must be reinforced that the voters can’t trust Mitt, that given a choice between their interests and the White House, Romney will surrender to his ambition every time. A smart democrat might go far on a promise to give Massachusetts a “rest” from Presidential politics.