Ingrates and Ingraham....
Laura Ingraham on Imus today...3-14-03

I stifled a yawn as Laura Ingraham spewed malice and venom on the Imus in the Morning Program today.
Imus and Laura are both syndicated by Westwood One making me wonder if it's in the I-man's contract that he HAS to have this spiteful talentless harpy on every four weeks or so. Cuz' quite frankly, Laura is so mind numbingly tedious that she could be bottled and sold to third world hospitals as cheap anesthesia.
Either that or Imus who is at best a doddering nasty old fool needs to breath some oxygen or something as Laura prattles on and on saying the exact same things about the exact same people from four and eight weeks ago.
Oh she tried to stir some sh*t up, taking shots at the "Dixie Chicks" for expressing anti-war sentiments...and sniping at the thought of what reception they'd get if said band went on a U.S.O. tour.
Here Laura is making the classic rightical chic error of conflating her own extremism with the alleged views of the troops in the field...frankly if I had a hard day dropping daisy-cutters through the clean desert breeze I'd welcome a Dixie Chicks appearance down by the airstrip....anti war sentiments be damned.
By the way...did you know it's all Colin Powell's fault?
Yup that is Laura's take on the matter....apparently the Secretary of State's unremarkable notion that enforcing a U.N. resolution to the letter ought to presuppose U.N. support is tantamount to appeasement in Laura's eyes.
Mark my words now that Bush has gone back on his promise to bring the matter of intervention to a Security Council vote a world of hard right sh*t will be exploding over Powell's head.
No instead Laura's post conservative policy is one of spite, if the U.N. won't obey, then throw the bums out and start a new more subservient international organization! Here she lapses into pure Gilbert-and-Sullivan and notes this organization could include such stalwarts as Bulgaria, Poland, Latvia, Spain and Italy....essentially she wants to enroll these minuscule and fragile duchies into what amounts to a new Warsaw Pact...composed for the most part by the dregs of the Old Warsaw Pact.
The notion that we are gonna actively police the world with the Bulgarians and Spanish as our sidekicks is a sure fire Broadway musical comedy formula.
But wait, it gets better; Laura then went on to disparage Angola and Cameroon for playing diplomatic hard to get in the lead up to the now cancelled Security Council vote.
Bulgaria and Latvia are lands fit for 21st century heroes...but Angola is an ungrateful pup-a more imbecilic Augustan view of the world couldn't be generated by the original if he tried.
Here at last is a drunken fembot's idea of foreign policy, the boozy contradictions fly fast and furious at 7:40am EST.
:)
The problem with obnoxious ne'er do well's like Laura is that for all their kewl-kidz put downs they are utterly uncontaminated by irony or subtlety. She lights into dim jewbaiting Representative Moran like he's Lavrenty Beria or something. Conveniently forgetting Moran's heroic efforts to get Bill Clinton impeached and thrown out of office.
Which is an object lesson to all squishies and moderates out there as to the perils of co-operating with our current punditariat. No matter how much service you render them, they'll turn on you in a second on any pretext if there is relative advantage to be gained.
There is just no percentage to trying to collaborate with the likes of Laura Ingraham. She's got the snitch mentality down pat, which is that betrayal is everyday business...and this goes back with her to her Dartmouth days when she was allegedly dating Dinesh D' Souza and forcibly outing homosexuals in the pages of the right wing Dartmouth Review.
Remember that.
But now I wonder, why is Laura so tedious?
As shrill as any hormone crazed teenybopper, she still excites exactly none of my passions...her whole trip is about stirring up the enmity of liberals.
Yet she does nothing for me...maybe it's because she comes off as such a phony.
She puts on a glib frantic eager-to-be-shocking tone but she is concealing a very sad tired desire to live in a Chilean style one party state.
It's that kind of thinking she has to conceal and keep concealing...because lets face it, tyranny still isn't kewl in this country, and Laura is not one to openly defy conventions no matter how much she wishes that General Pinochet was in charge of the U.S.

Such is the Kingdom of Hell
On the Congressionally Licensed Airwaves
And Elsewhere
7:50am EST